Battling teens

A confession - this is a rant, which I am sure all other parents or guardians of teens will bear with me as for others, this is the story of sweet angels turning into attitude monsters. I guess you reap what you sow - and being a temperamental teenager myself, I should have been prepared for the karmic and cosmic justice. But, every parent has this belief that they can handle better than others- at least I was sure about it - till now.

So how do you  deal with teens?  How does a parent respond to all  "why's ?, all the "oh I didn't hear you ?"or  Why do I have to clean my room and the classic Why do I make my bed, when the sheets are going to be messed up again at night ? Why can't I have a sleepover? You get the point. It  takes every bit of self-restraint - every single ounce of patience (which I don't have a lot), every mantra to resist retorts, every muscle control to stop the hands from spanking, every bit of my energy to just hang in and let the storm pass. Honestly, although I love challenges, dealing with the concotion of hormonal imbalance and attitude tempts me at time to take a sojourn for a couple of years and join in when the Mr. Hyde has turned back to Dr. Jekyll.

The mood-swings, the sheer laziness, the sloppiness  all adds to inflame my nerves and to soar my blood to new temperature. I am reminded everyday that all the emotional outbursts, all the dramatic and exaggerated slights are a side effect of puberty. You see the teacher has prepared the kids what to expect, but unfortunately the school forgot to arm the parents with tools to deal with it. Yes, the kids these days are well-armed with excuses to deal with the behavior - after all it is not their fault, it's the chemical imbalance that would definitely have gotten me spanked in my time. Having demanded full-excuse for my behaviour while PMSing I am in no position to refute that argument .


Parenting is challenging at every age. But by the time they are 12 , you are ready to sit back and reap the rewards of a fully functioning independent individual. And then  puberty happens and sweet child turns into this unrecognizable creature who you wish had the option to disown. The kid who would do all the chores with unquestioning loyalty and work ethics, now takes a week to empty the dishwasher. "why do I have to do all the work"? is what you hear more often than not.  This constant battle to find a balance between disciplining (?)  and loving (?) has made me wearier than a war-veteran. I am beaten up, yes I admit defeat.  I do wonder if the attitude will become a habit after the hormones are settled down, or the if chemical effect is going to be permanent. I shudder to think of any of these probabilities.

 I have started praying more often for serenity, have started chanting "this too shall pass ", and am able to empathize and respect all the parents of teenagers previous and current. And while I am waiting for the storm to pass, I am faced with two obvious cures to settle my nerves - take up drinking or meditation. I am still debating - although the inclination towards the first option seems to be more likely.