Just let go

If there was just one quality that I had to choose that would lead towards happiness, it is cultivating the habit of letting go. Losses are part of our lives. We all go through financial, emotional and personal losses at various stages in our lives. Is there a way to avoid pain and loss? No, it is part of living and part of life... even the trees have to shed leaves, rivers dry up, oceans go through low tides, flowers shed petals. Things happen, things beyond our control.. death of close ones, broken hearts, broken trusts, disappointments, failures and experiencing emotions that leave us uncomfortable. We, human beings are complex. We have mourning  periods for people who pass over, we accept the grief and then live our lives. Yet when we face emotional loss, we like to play the victim.

We complain, wallow in self- pity and are outraged at our imagined privileges being revoked. Life is not fair- that is the truth. Karma is delusional... yes I honestly believe that life does not care or keep account of your good or bad deeds. There is no such thing as trade offs. The only trade off is that when you do good, you feel good and when you hurt somebody you  feel bad. This is all considering that you have a conscious that is alive and kicking. Bad things happen to good people all time, it always has and always will .

Living a joyful and full life requires us to stop feeling victimized. Mourn over your losses and get over. Letting setbacks and disappointments consume and bog you down is what negativity is all about. One of the way to get over is to stop being self-centred. The moment we realize that life and living is greater than us, greater than our problems, we can choose to not to wallow in self pity. We all have the choice to either drag all our negativity with us or to travel light. Choose happiness, keep seeking light, and in time of darkness, let the stars keep you company and if not remember to bring your own source of light. 

Momentary bliss

Water hose on full blast, coloured shredded pieces of balloons strewn on the driveway, 15 kids, drenched to the core - all freezing still when I drove up. I had my jaw open, not believing the unexpected guests. One look at my son's face full of fear , made me realize that not reacting would be the wisest decision on my part. Contemplating on the day's event made me realize that  this what memories are made of - kids deciding on the spur of moment to get together to prank each other, only to end up in a water fight - armed with bucket, water hose and of course balloons. Isn't this what life is all about?  All the phones, all their electronics were all forgotten in that moment.

We are all looking for ways to live our life well, yet our life ends up being a series of activities trying to make a living. Practically, making a living, paying bills cannot be ignored. As we grow older, we can hear sand slipping through our fingers, time chipping away our years, as we desperately work hard to accumulate and secure our life.  Is it because of our incessant multi-tasking in our day to day activity, our over-exposure to information or is it that we no longer have the time to sit down with just our thoughts.

Uninvited and unwanted thoughts, impersonating as vandals wielding knives of fear of insecurity. Life seems rushed, our sources of joy more inaccessible and dependent on either people surrounding us or material goods. Learning to find joys in simple living means unlearning all that we have be accumulated. Unlearning, dissipating the myths of permanence of our opinions, including our views of what constitutes and contributes towards our well being, is the first step towards freedom. Freedom from societal pressures, freedom from the bondage of what is expected from us, and just being true to the very core of our existence.

Views and opinions

Opinions are just that... Opinions. It carries no weight and rightly should not matter so. What you think is your viewpoint, we all have the basic right to think and derive our own conclusions.  Every kid,every adult should be encouraged to think and form their own opinion.  Facts and truth are not the same, and in the same way what I think is not necessarily right.

Growing older and being wiser, I also realize that keeping my channels opened to new information, and reserving the right to change my opinion is a part and parcel of growing up. Whenever we close our minds, whenever we our stuck with what we believe to be right, we reject so many opportunities to learn and grow. 

Years ago, I rejected hard rock music, deeming it as loud . But when I sat down with my teenager, to listen, to understand the lyrics, it opened up a whole new world to me. I wonder what if I had obstinately stuck to listening to only what I had heard when growing up. I enjoy discussions, enjoy stepping out of my comfort zone to grow as a person. Every day I am exposed to new facts, new information, new people and new opinions that change the way I look at world. If I am not the same, how can I still be sticking to the same old opinions? 

If there is one thing that I have learnt in life, it is to keep your mind open. Be ready to accept your mistakes, be fertile to learning new things. There is no right or wrong. Years ago the thought of eating raw fish was unbearable, now I love eating sushi. Embrace new experiences, even of it makes you uncomfortable..because that is the only way to grow. 

Connecting the dots

I had the pleasure of watching the brilliant colours of evening skies melting into darkness. Someone splashed the sky with hues of orange and reds and then decided to quietly ease the dramatic colours to subdued greys. The living and breathing skies ...For that moment - watching the sky hide its talent, made me realise my good fortune to play the attentive audience.

Every stroke painted on the sky, every song played by the breeze, every twinkle, evening light, all seeking our attention defines the purpose of our life. Each time I am invited and included in the show or concert of nature, I feel I am the chosen one and that the purpose of life is to applaud nature's shows. Whenever we are connected to nature in our own small ways - we are connecting the dots, being part of what we were meant to be, announcing in our own small ways that yes - we belong to this planet.

Yet there are some moments, some sights , some sounds that inspire awe in us - this sense of disbelief that we could be lucky enough to be part of this journey called life. In that particular moment all your worries dissipate, all your sense of accomplishment or lack of it become unimportant and all you are aware of is that life is so much greater than us.

Connect with nature to feel blessed, to understand that we are part of it and the rules that apply in nature applies to us too. The rising and setting of sun, the waxing and waning of moon, the falling leaves, the drying rivers, the flaming forests - all a reminder that losses, failures are as much a part of life as the magnificent beauty of  power displayed by nature.