Another incident that struck me was when a seemingly fit 87 year old woman was complaining about losing 5 more pounds and all I could think was Seriously ? She was walking, she was coherent, she was healthy, yet the obsession with weight and the numbers was all she could think of. Maybe she had lived to be that old, because of her obsession with weight - maybe not.
I am rattled when a young mother talks proudly about how her two year old daughter comments on mom looking fat - and that is to a woman who I am sure would be termed underweight by her doctor. This obsession with our body, especially weight and our unhealthy relationship with food bothers me. It upsets me that we are all expected to fit into a slot that is supposedly deemed to be healthy. When someone labels young girls as "fat", I am enraged, no one has the right to label you - only your doctor and that too when you go to take advice. All our insecurities stem from irresponsible comments made by insensitive prigs. I remember being 6 years old and someone obviously "well-intentioned" advising my mom about using face packs to lighten my skin tone. I am 44 now , the words still haunt me and even now when I look in the mirror I see an ugly, dark girl .
I am all for healthy living, healthy eating, but we are all made differently. I would rather eat and be happy and live life and be who I am. I have learnt that there is always going to be someone slimmer, prettier, more intelligent, more successful than I am. But I have also learnt, that not everybody gets to live, not everybody gets to raise children, not everybody has all the limbs intact.
I am learning to accept my dark skin tone, learning to accept the body parts that I dislike - to let go and just be myself because I know if I can't disentangle myself from all self -image issues, I will grow old never actually living. Give me an overweight , obese joyous being any day over a grumpy skinny and miserable being.
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